A Perfect Blue Sky

“The greatest treasures are those invisible to the eye but found by the heart.”--Anonymous

So it's been awhile since my last post. There's a simple answer to that: school. It's had everyone busy. Homework and projects have already started trickling their way into our free time, and clubs have us busy outside of the halls of our school. How's a Quiet Kid supposed to think with all this stress. Well the truth is I've been thinking just a little too much recently. My brain is starting to hurt, truthfully, I can't stand the constant stream of work and problems that are trucking in my direction.

But that's what life is about, right? Accepting challenges and whatnot? I even said in my last post that blizzards need to be marched through. So why then do I feel that these blizzards I have are too difficult? Why can't I follow my own advise?

The only answer to that I've been able to come up with is that it's all been me being lonely. As always. I always seem to be moaning about that, don't I? The fact is that my loneliness is usually the inspiration I have for these rants and words of wisdom. But getting back on topic, I think that the reason why I'm not listening to my own advise is because there's no one there giving the advise to me. The reason I stand at my vitural pulpit and tell these things to you guys is because there's no one there doing it for me, and I don't want to you guys to feel that emptiness. But I can't say that I'm not learning along with you guys. The messages I pass on to you are usually messages that I have learned about myself merely hours or minutes before. Or like in the case of the offical Thoughts From The Quiet Kid that will appear in the November issue of the Concrete Courier, I learn the message as I'm writing it. That, with the added warm feeling of the feedback you give me ensures that I do not walk away empty handed.

"Stop talking about boring, mushy stuff and get on with it." You say. Very well then.

The message I have today is one that I don't believe full heartedly in. It's a subject that many other people have trouble with as well. That subject is hope. What is hope? Dictionary.com says that hope is "the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best". I view hope as a simple thing, something that puts a smile on our face and helps us march through our blizzards. (Talk about wearing something out)

I haven't felt alot of hope lately. I thought that this year would be different for me, but it doesn't seem to be a change for the better. I'm junior editor-in-chief for the Courier, but I sure as hell underestimated the work that job entails. I was also supposed to be lighting manager for the drama club, but here I find out that the school band director is taking it for himself without me or drama club ever being asked first. And as for school work...my first government project is turning out to be a real headache. I don't think that by now I should have to fill you in on my romantic status. Zip. Natta. Ziltch. Nothing at all. Bone dry, and every other phrase you could come up with to describe absolute loneliness.

So it hasn't been that good of year so far. Certainly not like how I planned it to be.

For some reason, I found myself thinking about all this stuff today. I had gone to my friend's house to work on the gov. project and that was okay, but when I got home I was notified that I needed to mow the lawn. During the process of mowing, I choose to skip weedwacking because, well, I wanted to just get it all done and out of the way. I never said I wasn't lazy. But my dad was working on his own things out in the front lawn, much to my dismay, and he noticed that I had not weedwacked and ordered me to do so.

As I went about 'wacking the weeds', I thought bitterly to myself: "If you don't like the way I do the lawn, do it yourself." I was just so bitter as all the stuff that was bothering me in my life hitting me like a frieght train. Problems have a way of bunching together and hitting you when you least expect it. Why don't I have a girlfriend yet? Why can't I just have the lighting booth that I worked so hard for? Why do I view newspaper as so much work when that work used to be fun for me?

I couldn't bare all the thoughts pounding on the insides of my brain. It was as I finished wacking a flowerbed of weeds, however, that something counter-acted against these mind-numbing thoughts. The flower bed in question was right next to a backyard gazebo that was shading me from the sun. I let go of the power for a second and looked up at the sky to wipe sweat from my brow. I was listening to my Ipod while working as well, and it was in this moment of looking up the sky that I had my revelation.

The song that was playing was "So She Dances" by Josh Groban. (Yeah, I listen to him, wanna fight about it? Ha.) The sky was a brilliant blue with fluffy white clouds and the light from the sun shone down upon the green earth.

"When I close my eyes I can see, the spotlight's are bright on you and me." Josh Groban sang into my headset as I looked at sky, with only two amazing clouds lazily gliding around the hidden sun's brightness.

"We've got the floor and you're in my arms, how could I ask for more?" I moved away from teh gazebo to keep a full view of the sun and the clouds around it.

"So she dances in and out of the crowd, like a glance. This romance is from afar, calling me. Silently." The sun flooded my eyes and I closed them. I held my hand up to it so I could get a better look at the sky. It was a brilliant baby blue, and other than the clouds around sun, it was clear of any obstructions. The sun lit up the whole world as well as my heart. When looking at something as simple as a blue sky, how could I be bitter anymore?

Who cares if Newspaper is hard work? Isn't everything else? Who cares if my dad is forcing me to weedwack? He just wants the lawn to look nice for my mother. Who cares if the band director wants the lighting booth to himself? I know I won't let him take it from me. Who cares if I don't have a girlfriend? Actually I do still care about that one, very much. But who's to say there isn't a beautiful girl out there looking at that very same blue sky?

If you're still reading this and haven't clicked out and away from my drooling over a 'perfect sky', than I will wrap this up for you. My message today is the lesson I learned by simply looking up at the sky. Life's biggest problems can be cancelled out by life's littlest things. Sure, a blue sky won't deliever a girlfriend or a lighting booth to me on a silver platter, but it will ease the pain for awhile.

And if you're saying that the quote from before isn't really working out here, it actually kinda does. Think about it: a perfect blue sky lessened some of my burdens, but that might not have worked for you. It all depends on who we are and the type of heart we have. Hugs, perfect looking skies, and picturesce landscapes do the trick for me. It's up to your heart to decide what works for you.

I don't know what kind of problems might have you down at the moment, but I just want to say good luck, and that I'm here for you. We all have pitfalls (blizzards :3) to get past, but if we stick together and help one another, we'll make it. Now get off the computer and go out and find your perfect skies! Until next time, friends.

What are the little things that make you feel better? Leave a comment here or on myspace telling me what your thoughts are!